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Parents tend to be overprotective of their kids and shield them from all possible problems that may or may not come in their way but is it a right approach to be followed? By doing this you not only risk them of developing lazy behavior but also turn timidness out of them who won't be able to handle the problems on their own when they step out into the real world without you and that has many health hazardous ramifications like stress and depression. So what are the ways to make sure that you uphold a balance between over-protectiveness and being guarding? So, here are 5 tips that will help you do just that:
Turn their requests into fun games
When you keep on solving your kids biggest to most minuscule of problems. They see it as an easy way out and keep bringing on their problem to you again and again. Like, "Mom, I can't seem to find my socks"? What do you do? You leave everything else and rush onto find your kids socks. This may sound cute in the beginning but eventually, the constant reliance of your kid on you for even smallest of the problems gets nagging and irritating. So, what you can do is turn these problems into fun games. How? Tell your kid to emulate the Detective Tin Tin in the adventures of Tin Tin comic series and think hard on where he could have possibly kept those socks? And Kids are always up for games and adventure.
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Discuss with them about the problems and contingencies
You may teach your child to be independent- walk to school, do dishes, be alone at home when you are gone out for work or run some errands, but does he know what to do when an emergency strikes? Like what would he do when he returns from the school and the house door is locked? Who should he approach at that time? Sit him down and hash out with him different scenarios about the possible risky scenarios that might strike at any time and how should he keep it together and approach the problem in an intelligent way.
Encourage them to lose while trying instead of not trying at all
Everyone dreads failure be it a kid or an adult. Teach your kid not to be afraid of challenges that he might face in life. Kids tend to give up easily on something that they are not good at. If your kids loves playing football but he is not able to score any goals while his best friend is kicking the ball across the goal post every time, that could discourage the kid and he might stop playing the game altogether but this is where your role comes into play, you have to encourage him to be relentless and keep on playing the game even if it means getting some bruises on the knees while playing.
Have a Little Faith
It's important to show some faith in your child. You can't expect kids to do things perfectly every time and match up to your expectations. There will be times when things would go haywire, because at the end of the day you have to realize that you are dealing with just a kid only. So instead of losing your temper on him, applaud him and give him full marks for trying. So, it doesn't break his morale and deter him from trying to deal with the problems in the future.
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Ask good questions to invoke problem-solving attitude
If you are accustomed to dealing with every little problem that your child faces then, then asking the good questions to invoke problem tendencies of your kid can be challenging. Whenever your kid comes to you with some trouble, the first question you should ask is, Do you think you can deal with this on your own? The second one should be, how do you think I can help you solve this problem. Asking these questions balances out the element of protection and over-protection. So, it makes him aware of his responsibilities while dealing with the problem and not throw it all out on your shoulders alone.
It's always important to show some patience while dealing with a kid because as the saying goes, "Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet."
