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Hello to all the gorgeous ladies from the ‘not-so-pretty-without-makeup’ squad! When did you start applying stuff on your natural skin to look more ‘polished’ or ‘pretty’ or plain unnatural? 20 something, maybe. You were grown up and were aware of your choices and their repercussions. But is it the same with your teenage daughter who is stepping on the adulthood platform with a red carpet made up face?
She might have a vogue model pinned on her bedroom wall and be cribbing about the fact that she does not match the standards. You pretty much passed the same phase but watching your daughter do the same is altogether a different thing. It is this time that her body is changing and all the ‘hormone cocktail’ is luring her into trying the beauty stuff. Does giving into her wishes to apply makeup at 13 sounds justified to you? If not read on to know what you can do!
Question Her
First thing is first. Ask your daughter what compels her to dab the white stuff and conceal her natural beauty. Her response is likely to be, “It will make me look pretty or better”. Inquire further. What makes her think she will look pretty after makeup? That’s what the advertisements tell her or maybe she is interpreting what the fashion magazines are showing. Listen without interrupting, understand her point before you speak.
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Answer Her
Now that you have heard her out, she is more likely to lend you an ear. Say things that will move her and change her idea and concept about applying makeup. Explain to her the reality of the industry. She is being shown that makeup turns you a lot prettier, through the fashion industry. People out there are imposing their views on her. Ask her if being influenced is what she prefers? Will she be happy by trading her natural glow for a fake shine?
Validate
There is no point in saying a clear ‘no’. She will just believe you to be double faced for applying it all on yourself and pushing her out of it. Tell her that at her age it is not the right thing and when you were her age you did not really bother about looks. It is the age to play, study, have fun and leave the beauty saga for the future. If that does not work as she is too inclined to look ‘nice’, divert her attention towards clothes, shoes, and accessories. Aren’t they a better alternative to cosmetics?
Allow Choice
There are times when you feel that a downright ‘no’ can make matters worse and you need a better plan to deal with the situation. Plan your next move by offering her a bag of cosmetics. Trust us and read on. The bag would contain only those things that seem somewhat age appropriate though makeup at this tender age is not a good idea at all. Allow her to choose 3 items and try to slightly influence her decision. Encourage her to pick items of personal hygiene like face wash, moisturizer and maybe a transparent gloss. She will think that you gave in but the truth is rightly concealed!
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Negotiate
If everything fails and you are unable to get her off the makeup, try striking a deal. Loosen up a bit. By this, we do not mean that you allow her a look of pancaked face with blue eyeshadow and blood red lips. Even our imagination falters at this scenario! But what is a more practical approach will be is to allow her some makeup on special occasions. A deal on simple gloss with kajal may be the most you can settle for, that too for parties and not on a regular basis. This might calm her down and get you all on talking terms again!
Makeup at such a tender age is not what you’d want to see on your little darling’s face. That’s not quite what you’d need to build her trust in herself and lead a confident life. It's about her body image and self-confidence that you can’t mess with. So convince her, trick her or negotiate with her. Whatever it takes, it's going to be in favor of your girl’s overall personality and happiness!
